Sunday, October 9, 2011

The beauty in change.


My niece at Waimanalo.

"Love yourself, love life, love others..."

Before I left to relocate to Hawaii, I asked my friends to give me something to read for my ridiculous layover in Seattle. I just barely listened to a voicemail that one of my friends e-mailed me before I left Utah. The quote above was the last thing she said before she ended her voicemail: "Love yourself, love life, love others."

It has been a very eventful past two months. Yes, I took a trip all around the continental United States, it seems, in September. Actually, I just went to Arizona. It wasn't that big of a deal, but I'm glad that I was able to travel a little before I came back to Hawaii. Arizona was a lot of fun. I enjoyed the people that I stayed with there, and I always get excited when I'm getting ready to travel. The experiences I've had recently have been priceless.

I have met a lot of people just at the airports. I met the cutest old couple on my flight from Seattle to Hawaii, who were nice enough to tell me all about their family and their travels. They told me they were staying with their daughter who lives here. She teaches at UH and they told me about a son they had who relocated to Jakarta, Indonesia. I told them that inspired me to be a little more adventurous and take more risks in life. I'm not sure how big of a risk coming to Hawaii is. After all, nearly my entire extended family is here. [laughs] But, it has definitely been an adventure.

(My dad, brother and I, walking to the Navy Exchange & Commisary below)

I have had some highs & even a few lows since I've been here. Everyone keeps asking me what the biggest adjustment has been relocating back to Hawaii. The biggest adjustment, quite truthfully, is just not being able to afford living on my own. I miss having the security of knowing I can break away if I wanted to. We're all still getting used to one another's quirks and personalities, given that my mom just got remarried. It hasn't always been an easy transition, but it's obviously where I need to be right now. I believe that things happen for a reason, and that God brings us through circumstances to allow us to grow. And, I see the atmosphere here. There's a lovingness about Hawaii that can't be beat, and it has definitely helped me to grow. I'm not saying that everyone here is perfect, but I see much more compassion and acceptance here. The first few days were tough. I missed the modern conveniences & the fast pace of the mainland, but the more I open my mind, the more I realize I am indefinitely in paradise.

Drive to visit my grandmothers' graves.

Being here has definitely brought out all my emotions. In a way, though, I think that has helped me to be a little more discerning in the choices I make. My spirituality is better here. No offense to my Utah peeps (lol) but my spirituality suffered immensely when I was there. Before I left, I came to a lot of realizations about the friends I have & how truly selfish a lot of the people I surrounded myself by were. If and when I do move back, I plan on being much more selective about who I associate with, and I think I'd have a better grasp on others' characters. I was definitely more appreciative of my family while I was there, and I miss my cousin, Katherine the most. So the playlist is dedicated to you and all the nights we danced or listened to music, and YES, we will karaoke when I see you again. ;)

Brunch at Trio!

I'll try to be a better cousin. But, thank you for letting me stay at your place and for doing so much for me before I left. I felt like I could finally breathe when I got to your apartment. Then, we had a little too much fun but hey, might as well. ;)

I'm grateful for what I've had and what's to come. It's nice to see my mom in a healthy environment and watching her be with someone after being alone for so long. I know I can be a handful, but I appreciate the fact that my family sticks by me and deals with my crazy emotions sometimes. So, whatever will be, will be, will be. Hawaii it is for now...